Wednesday, June 11, 2008

The Skull Sauna

The skeletal spotlight shines this time on:
A Skull-shaped Sauna


This thing would make you break out in a sweat without even getting into it.

This backyard sauna from hell, shaped like a skull, might seem like the ultimate Halloween yard decoration, but it's actually made for regular use. By the Grim Reaper, possibly? Satan? Roseanne Barr?

It was created by an artist who makes his pieces reflect his views on politics, death and sex... and all three at once, where possible. I suppose that makes sense when you look at Washington today. Here's a statement about the Skull Sauna from his site:

Wellness Skull, 2007

"The Wellness Skull is an impressive large skull. Just like Wellness centers it has a few places to relax. In the neck of the skull is a small bath. The head of the Skull contains a sauna. When it is working the hot steam pears (sic) out of the eye sockets.

Joep van Lieshout about the Wellness Skull: “The heavenly power is the big unknown, the death of the hereafter, the skull of physical shell of the mind. The earthly power is a economical power, money plays an important role on our contemporary society. Gradually the faith loses all importance and is replaced by an alternative ‘self experience’, through travelling, sporting and wellness centres.”

I have no idea what any of that is supposed to mean. I suspect it's not any mental deficiency on my part, but rather, that the entire statement reflects the weirdness and existentialisim of the builder. In other words, meaningless BS. His site bears this up. Other sculptures depict huge male members and group enemas. I trust no-one who has for an entry page drawings of a naked man hanging from wires by various appendages, including the whack-a-doodle, which I'm sure couldn't hold your body weight without coming off.

In other words, he's out of his skull even when he's in this.

Another thing to consider is that the danger level of such a device is geometrically increased by shaping it like a Death's Head. Getting stuck in it when the door jams and broiled alive by scalding steam is practically a certainty with a shape like that. That's not just tempting fate, it's smacking it in the face and saying "now whatcha gonna do, bad boy?" Ironic doom is not that hard of a natural force to invoke.

And as the coroner examines your cooked, peeling-flesh corpse, he'll say, "Well, what did he expect, taking a steam bath inside a skull?" And he'd be right, you asked for it.

5 comments:

Karswell said...

>meaningless BS

My thoughts exactly after reading the statement too. Is it possible the guy speaks English as a second language? Well, whatever language he speaks we can all agree on one thing: Skulls of any size rule.

Fred said...

Karswell,

I do believe English is not his native tongue, but good ideas can come across even when one doesn't speak a language well, through poor translation. His stuff is nonsensicle in any words!

But I have to admit the look of the skull is cool, you're right.

Patrick said...

Makes me wonder if I spent some time relaxing in that thing if it would make me want to draw more skulls...

Fred said...

Patrick,

It might, but preferably not at the same time you're in it... the ink would run, the paper would sag and rip.

On the other hand, it might have the opposite effect. You might, whilst relaxing in the steamy vapors, drift off into a sensory-deprivation-inspired nightmare, intruded upon by the demons inhabiting the skull. And when you awoke, screaming and incoherant, you would spend the rest of your life drawing cute sheep, adorable cherubs, and happy faces.
-Fred

Aji said...

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