Sweet, Sweet, Sugary Substitute Of Death

The skeletal spotlight shines this time on:
"The Latest" magazine cover

Consume my sugar substitute and you'll be "The Latest..." VICTIM! Bwaa-ha-haaa!

This eye-catching cover is using the proven power of the skull in advertising. I don't know whether the information is accurate, but I'm getting antsy about it now.

Here's the source article: www.dorway.com/lethal.html

I especially was interested in the symptoms that it causes, according to the site:

"There are 90 documented symptoms including: Headaches, Muscle spasms, Irritability, Heart palpatations, Loss of taste, Joint pain, Dizziness, Weight gain, Tachycardia (heart racing), Breathing difficulty, Tinnitus (ringing in the ears), Blurred vision, Seizures, Rashes, Insomnia, Anxiety attacks, Vertigo, Hearing loss, Nausea, Depression, Blindness, Slurred Speech, Memory Loss, Fatigue, Numbness. "

Weird! I had all those symptoms just last night, all at the same time! I thought it was just from watching too many scary movies. So I irritably shrugged it off, as I dizzily and painfully weaved down the hallway, twitching and anxiously gasping for breath as I blindly bumped into the depressingly tasteless hallway walls, forgetfully dripping watery waste down my leg and scratching peeling skin from my fat, tired, numb behind.

Felt okay thish morning, though. Musht have been all the barfing that got it out of my shystem. Musht thtop watching tho many thcary movies.

Ish that the phone ringing? (Thud.)